Extra large, extra sweet, Happy Hour Half Off Drinks
Sausage biscuits and bean burritos, 5 for 5
Chicken fried steak, mashed potatoes and gravy, just like mom’s
Deviled eggs and potato salad, now we’re talkin’
Texas fudge cake
Poke cake
Finish your plate
Finish your sister’s plate
Finish the pot
Why do you eat so much?
You’re getting big
You should cut carbs
Eat noodle-free lasagna
And crust-less quiche
Have a salad with ranch, 3 kinds of meat and cheese
Chug this appetite suppressant
Watch this celebrity eat the burger with the dripping sauce
Exercise 4 hours a day
Drink a gallon of water
Diabetes?
Take this pill
Switch to grilled chicken and diet soda
Heart Disease?
Now another pill
Can’t walk? Can’t breathe?
Switch to this pill
You’re going to love this oxygen tank
Failing organs?
Sedate to Medicate
Infection Cardiac Arrest Brain Death
Don’t tell the family
Ship the patient to hospice
Turn off the machines
Hold a memorial service
In your memory
We’ll take another bite
-Melissa Donley